Alone in the Dark

Being alone is terrible. I hate being alone. I despise the fact so much, that I even hate to have my meals alone. Not to point out the fact that I'm LOA (Lack Of Attention), but try to be in my shoes. It's also not to mention that I don't have friends, on the contrary, I have lots of caring ones. The loneliness is not felt physically, rather, mentally.

I don't want to be this way. I don't want to feel this way. The emptiness was briefly filled, never had I felt so glad and happy about it, but it would be vacanted soon, briefly for the least. During the brief moments, I felt the glimpse of light, like the one at the end of a dark and long tunnel. Now, as I walked on the shadowy path, the light still shines, but unlogically getting dimmer. I tried running to it, yet I can't catch up with it. I'm resolute enough not to give up. Somehow, it kept slipping through my fingers.

I know it's possible to work out. I know it, from the bottom of my puny little heart. However, the fact always remain. No dance is complete without a partner, nor no sound will be heard if only one hand is trying to clap. Help me understand better, why is it this way. I want things to work out. In fact, I'll go to hell and back to prove myself and my worth in this.

Sigh.

I hope and I pray, and all my prayers rests in God's palms, that it's possible to work this out together. Being all that I'm worth, I'm nothing in God's eyes. All that, adds to the gloom and emo-ness that had been clouding my mind at the moment. But, I'll remain steadfast and confident in the matter. Hopefully, this would last me though the end of days, or shorter, the end of my life.

I don't want to lose 'you'. 'You' know how I feel as well. 'You' know me well enough, close enough, I hope. Hope 'you' know that, it's never too late.

I hope that the month of November slip by quietly and December would be a new ray of light shining through my dim, colorless life.

-1.4.3-